my Life

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

For some reasons, my heart still aches.
I hate this feeling.

We knew it's not possible.

Done with our MICE project.
And ThinkingSkills up next.
I have simply no idea if i can pass this.
Yet i chose to do it alone.
Haiz.
But thanks to you peeps, i have help all along.

A stubborn personality gets you nowhere.
I just hope i get a passing grade at least.

Time passes so quickly.
Just a blink of an eye, and i'm already coming 19.
4 more years, and i'll be 23 of age.
Hmmm. That's kind of old.
But curious to find out what i will be like by that time.

Project's due on Thursday.
And i'm not anxious at all.
Lol. As if i can get a sure-pass!
Yeah, continue dreaming.

Labels: - Fated to love you

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

I can actually take it.
Again, i sacrificed my sleep for school work.
Lol.
I thought i was going to faint in the train, but a girl from my school, fainted first before i did.
Haha.
But she's ok after a while's rest.
And me??
Like a zombie without the soul, running all the way to school.
Yes, i'm late, as usual.

Never sleep also will late -.-"
*Shake head...

Dropped dead during lessons.
Fortunately, nothing was taught.

The storm on my side seemed to calm down for the time being.
Just hope i see the rainbow and sunshine soon.

Labels: - Stuck in square one

Monday, August 25, 2008

And next stop London!

Let's wait till Year 2012!

Olympics has come to an end after 16days.

Every 4 yrs, it got even better.

Every medal represents glory, pride, determination,, recognition, courage & accomplishment.

Stay home all Sunday.

Been sitting in front of the com since the time i woke up.

Lol.

Damn no life.

And everytime i have nothing to occupy me with, i would just search for possible edible items and pop into my mouth, non-stop.

Like today, i had been exercising my mouth, munching on food: burger, fries, popsicles, biscuits, dragonfruits, grapes, half a pack of banana milk, breadloaf & dinner.

By the rate of all these continuous eating, i'll grow rounder and rounder.

My god -.-

If the bite means something,
an answer i have always been wanting to ask,
wouldn't it be nice?

I could never shake off the fact that i'm a klutz.

See the huge patch of bruise.

And don't ask how i got it.

It's really hard to explain.
Lol.

Labels: - Looking for my guardian angel

Saturday, August 23, 2008

A pat on my back for the good job!
We finally talked...
Phew~

That's some courage i plucked out from, somewhere somehow.

Anyway, on to the next topic.
Sometimes i do feel stupid in handling things.
Hmmm. Always putting priorities in the wrong things at the wrong time.
And gaining nothing from it??
Always making the wrong choices.
That's what i'm capable at doing.
Shrug.

First day working in a new environment.
Nice people. Nice place.
Everything's almost perfect there i suppose.
But never get too satisfied and comfortable.
It's just my first day =)
Well, hope everything will turn out fine, although it's abit too far.

Olympics' coming to an end soon.
Hmmm. 4 years to another Grand Ceremony at another new place.
London, isit??
But i'm more looking forward to the Youth Olympics, 2 years after this ^^
Always my dream to be in it.
But never will be accomplished.

Do you really care??
Then why treat me like you do??

Labels: - i'm your superglue

Friday, August 22, 2008

Can't believe it.
No matter how tired i am, i won't stay in bed for more than 10 hrs.
I missed my sleep the night before last's.
And yesterday, i dozed off the moment i reached home.
Watching the Volleyball match, USA VS Cuba, while waiting for my bro done using the com.
After awhile, i just closed my eyes and drifted to dreamland.
It was 4plus at that moment.
Then i forgot how i ended up in bed, but i did remembered i got up from the sofa somehow, and into my bedroom.
Hmmm. There i slept all the way until 1plus, i even missed dinner!
Was woken up by the phone rings, then my parents urged me to go back to sleep again.
Then, i slept till 7plus, too early, went back to sleep again, till now, 9plus.
LOL. From 4plus pm to 9 plus am, it's around 16hrs!!!
Shocking!

Ahhh... must treat my papa to dinner somehow.
Didn't celebrate his birthday properly.
Only wished him on that very morning of his birthday through phone call.
Hugz~ Ilove my papa!

Labels: - If dreams turn into reality...

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Is there a problem with girls??
Or guys just cannot find satisfaction from normal girls?
Lol!
Why all hot guys turned gay?!?!
OMG!
They're cute, with charming smiles, small but adorable-looking eyes, tanned, fit, hunky and they're so so sweet.
Awww~ ok... both of them are super HOT!
But they're... yes... gays.
WTHECK?!?!
Whyyyy~
So smittened with their looks. My tired eyes wide open when they stroll in to the restaurant.
Totally took my breath away. *faint.
And they're so nice =)
My type of guy... but why gay??
And pretty ladies turn lesbian -.-
No offense. But leave some decent straight ones for us can??
LOL.

I find myself like a sticky memo pad.
Convenient when in need and easy to get rid of when used.
Have a hard time to reject and say No.
Don't have our own say.
Hmm. What kind of life am i actually leading, i wonder.

Finally finished our Design Portfolio.
Learned alot, yet forgot alot too. Haha.
Moving on to MICE.
Alot to do, yet so little time and thinking space.
I seem stuck in somewhere. I don't really know how to compile everything properly.
And mine's the easiest to do.
Not going to complain.
They can finish theirs. I can too.
Push on it.

Ricebowl's threatening to break.
Haiz.
Can life get any better?

I see a rainbow right ahead, but can't seem to reach the destination.
It looks so near, yet so far away.

I'm so in the KBox mood now -.-"

I saw her today.
And i chose to look away and walk faster.
Lol.
Don't know what the hell am i doing.

Labels: - If we were given a second chance...

Monday, August 18, 2008

Lane 2's cursed!
Lol. And why do i say that...
Because the runner before the heat that LiuXiang's running for the 110m Hurdles, injured himself while the first jump of hurdles, thus wasn't able to finish the race.
He hit his knee while trying to jump over the first hurdle.
Then LiuXiang, who's positioned at Lane 2.
Retired after a false start.
He seemed to have given up on the race due to his leg injury.
Hmmm. Was kindof disappointed.
He may have the chance to go into the qualifying round or maybe get himself a medal, if he did finish the race.
Such a pity. The best timing wasn't fantastic.
Sad.

Finished watching 櫻野 3+1.
Nice. I like~
Haha.
MingDao's damn cute. I think he and QiaoEn makes a compatible pair though.
Hee.

Does true love really exist??

Labels: - An athlete's glory - strive towards the finishing line.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

A bunch of contradictors.
I suspect they read the wrong bible.
What don't be judgemental, must have a heart...
Everything's bullshit!
How can you do this to us??

Backstabbed me behind my back.
Sheesh, not easy being a good person.
Begged us when you needed us.
Shove us aside when you finished using us.
Biatch!
It's time you should redeem some karma points from the KarmaRedemptionCounter.
Accumulate too many points yourself already.

Now i realise, how scary society can be.
Although i only encounter a small part of it.

Anyone can betray everyone because of money.
Beware. Because even the closest person to you can easily make use of you with the temptation of coloured notes.
Adults. I would never grow up being like them.
Devils with the disguise of angels.
Note: I'm not talking bout my parents. They love me too much to do anything to harm me.

We'll definitely find a better job.
Don't have to pretend to be concerned.

Labels: - Money cannot buy happiness.

Saturday, August 16, 2008

ILovehis gold spikes shoes!
Usain Bolt from Jamaica broke WR for 100m with his beautiful pair of gold shoes.
I also want one! Haha!

I'd left the tracks too long.
And i want to go back again.
But only to the tracks.
Haha.
We'll see =)

I still have to say this.
I love that pair of gold shoes!
AHAHAHAHA~

Yet another boring Saturday =/

Labels: - Time waits for no man.

Friday, August 15, 2008

What's wrong with wanting to be loved??
Am i not worth any of yours??

I broke down in front of my teacher today.
But still no use.

When will my heart ever be ready?
Who will i open it up to?
I don't want to always be stuck in square one.
You never loved me.
Yet i ended up in this state.
What did i do to deserve all this?

Thanks for everything.
All the care and concern, i appreciated it.
You're always the one allowing me to cry on your shoulder.
Always the listening ear when i had all night to complain about everything.
I'm happy for all your flatters.
But i'm sorry i cannot answer to your affections.
Although i know there's 0% of you reading this, i still believe the both of you will work out somehow =)

Three weeks with no income earned -.-
Haiz.

Labels: - Romantically challenged.

I'm getting debarred soon... AGAIN!
Wthell~
Ahhhh~

I've woken up from my dreamland and starting to work harder than before.
Making an effort to show them i'm keen to continue and want that second chance.
Like mama always said to me, she'd never given up on me before. And hoped i would not give up on myself. It's never too late to try again, if you want to.
Her words seldom stays in my mind.
Only recently when she told me what my brother said to her, then did i want to pass the whole term.
I'm motivated by his concerns.
I feel so inferior myself. Always have been.
He's always the smartest one in the family.
Being the eldest, i should be the one showing him the role model. But it ended up the other way around.
No matter how badly i had done, he'll never look down on me.
Although he seldom shown me the concern bout my school and my life, he'll find ways to find out what's happening to me from my parents.
He's always there for me quietly, and i regret for not appreciating that.
He's my little brother whom i should protect. But he seems much stronger than i am.
I'm always proud of his achievements, like he does for me.
He never complained bout whatever i told him to do, while i always did.
He'll look out for me in a silent way.
I love him so much, this is the fact that will never change.

Watched 12Lotus. Well, it passed satisfactory rating, and it did made my eyes wet for that last scene where she swallowed her mum's pendant in order to prevent the guy from taking it away.
The whole story was a sad life bout a girl named LianHua.

I want to watch MoneyNo Enough2 and TheMummy =)

Hmmm.
I've thought about it.
I shouldn't hold on to any hopes.
Like i always told the girls, if he's meant to be yours, no matter how many many obstacles there is, you both will still be together somehow someday.
Well, at least i knew all along that we're never meant to be.
Waiting is a torture.
Waiting for the fact that knowing he'll never come back is an agony.

Labels: - Set me free

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

I miss the warmth from your body.
I miss the concerned tone from your voice.
I miss the worried look from your facial expression.
I miss the kiss from your lips.
I miss the playful lick on my cheek from your tongue.
I miss your touch.
And i want it all back.

I hate the feeling of being ignored.
I hate the feeling of losing you.
I hate the feeling of knowing i'm nothing to you.
I hate the feeling of just being there when i'm needed.
I hate the feeling of being a spare.
I want to be loved by you.

Things are happening all of a sudden.
Hmmm maybe not that sudden.
But it took me so long to realise.
Why did you choose to tell me all this?
So isit a punishment or a bliss for me??
Some truths, i rather not know.

Should i let you go for other options?
Or should i just wait for a miracle to happen??
If i'm gone, away from your life, will you start to give chase & regret losing me?
Or just let me fly, just to let me have a better life??

You're the reasons why for so many things.
But how come it seems to me that you don't realise.

Labels: - There's still space for a second chance

Monday, August 11, 2008

Am i easily manipulated?
Believed in people's words easily?
Take people's problem into my account?

Sometimes i thought i don't need people to repay my kindness.
But i realised i do, i just want people to appreciate what i do.
But maybe i didn't do enough, that's why people don't see my effort on the surface.

Look beyond your fingers.
You'll find something much more amazing.

Yeah... I'm trying to look beyond everything.
Understand the situation & appreciate every moment.

When is the last time i genuinely laughed out loud?
I don't even recall.

Haiz.
Emo mode turned on suddenly.
Well, i'm gonna shake it all away.

Labels: -You're the reason why

As promised!
A few photos taken at our Phuture NiteOut!
Thanks Lianyin =D

Crazy Sam

Damn high, lol Mr Bouncer

Flaming Lamborghini

(Left to right: me, Jaslin's sis Pearl, Lianyin & Jaslin)

With the birthday boy!

Made a mental note myself.
Never show off my blingsblings during camwhoring.
Lol. Wthell!

Labels: - It's the way it is

I must stay cheerful, must stay cheerful.
NOoo!
I can't!
Wthell!

Bloody hell!
The driver actually forgot to change the AngMoKio plate to Punggol plate, both me and snow happily boarded the bus, when i realised passengers quarreling with the driver & me noticing that the bus' taking the other route.
That's when i realised we took the bloody wrong bus when it's already 1130pm.
Luckily got snow with me, i'm actually damn scared la.
Thought i was lost.
No choice. Walked to the nearest busstop to take another bus back to AMK.
Waited damn long, and was worried that we couldn't catch the last train.
Snow still dare to laugh at me, saying i look funny when i look scared.
Wthell -.-
Then the other bus we took was damn slow.
What's with all these drivers ah?
God.

Work was fine la.
Nothing special.
But i became very noisy during dinner time. Everyone thinks i work till crazy. Too tired. Haha.

We had roti prata for staff dinner.
Was really nice.
Hand made by Krishnan.
I had 1 mushroom+cheese prata & 1 butter with sugar.
Both are damn nice!
I think i'm the only one who had special order.
AHAHAHAHAHA~
No choice. I don't like egg prata.
The pratas were twice the size a normal prata sold outside la.
Very full.
And the curry he cooked, 2 thumbs up!
Yumyum~

Labels: - Bring me to somewhere safe.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

It was a success for our Pixel Lab's gallery =)
Happy! Happy!
And Bell's photo won first prize!
To be honest, her picture was really nice.
Must thank me partially also ah!
Hehe!

National Day Celebration in school was normal as usual.
Refreshments were nice as usual.
Ilovefood~

After packing up the whole gallery room, rushed to meet my aunt to pass her something.
Boarded & got off alot of buses, just to get to one simple place.
LOL.
I can easily get lost by taking buses.

Then rushed home to prepare myself for the night.
ZoukNightOut with usual people & new people.
My dumb bro's 20!
Of course this bro isn't blood-related.
My real brother's very smart one ok.
Anyway, clubbing was indeed fun yesterday.
With fun people, Mervyn, Wilson, Lianyin, Sam, Kat, JX, Dan, Jaslin & her sister.
Drinking with sam & Jaslin was crazy.
I swear they're out to torture me. LOL.
Tried 2 new drinks.
Graveyard from Jaslin and Flaming ____ from sam.
The blank wasn't intentional, i forgot the full name of it. Heh.
Flaming was nice. Taste abit like Kahlua. Sweet.
Graveyard was totally disgusting!
Felt kena cheated by my very own senior.
Yes! The world is just so small.
Jaslin's my senior from 2 schools. Both secondary & ITE.
I vomitted after i down the last bit, vomitted back into the glass.
Eww~ yeah... i know. Lol.
And i broke a glass. Practically, toppled the glass, and it hit the wall so hard that it broke. =D

At least we managed to drunk mervyn & gave him a painful present from each of us =p

Great partying companions =)
Pictures will be up soon, i suppose ^^

Aww~ i missed watching NDP on tv =(
I forgot that today's National Day and i called in to book.
I thought i wasn't working in the morning tomorrow morning.
And i booked for the night shift too.
So i ended up working full tomorrow.
Wthell.
Saded.

I'm so so tired la.

Monday's holiday!
But i don't know what to do on that day.
No plans.
So sian.

Labels: - Yesterday

Friday, August 08, 2008

I've finally finished the flyer design and typing tons of Chinese and English words into it.
Requested by my aunt.
In return, she'll do pedicure for me for free!
AHAHAHAHA!
Was supposed to find the Japanese translations, but i passed it.
Don't want to screw up the whole thing.
LOL.

I'm SOOOO tired now.
It's already 3.30 in the morning.
And i have to wake up at 6am to prepare for school O.O
It's our PixelLab BIG day!
Well, kind of =)
It's like having an Official Grand Opening for our club.
Haha.
But anyway, we're so gonna rock the whole event tomorrow!
Hmmm.
Hope so. But i suppose everything will turn out right yeah?!
*wink.

HighSchoolMusical IceTour's awesome!
Perks my interest in skating =)
Although the skaters aren't the real casts who starred in the movie, the whole show's still an eye opener.
Enjoyed the whole show.
Had fun with the company.
And i met Fiona & Ibsen!
Not really pure coincidence though.
They're actually working as ushers there.
Damn cool la.
So slack.
LOL.
I don't mind working lo.
Can watch the shows for free =D
Pictures will be uploaded soon, i hope.
Hehe. When the mood's right.

Ok.
I can feel it.
My body needs the bed.
Night peeps!
Ummm... more to Morning.
Haha! Good Morning then!

Labels: - You are the music in me

Thursday, August 07, 2008

All of a sudden i have soooo many things packed in my already packed schedule.
LOL.
Gei kiang.
Take up so many things to make myself busy, when i don't have time for myself already.
-.-"

Papa's still mad at me =(
What to do lei?!
Haiz.
So sian.

Pimples outbreak like mad.

Have to travel to so many places.
Abit sian la.
Sleeping in trains and buses is not a pleasant experience.
Not comfortable.
Sobz.

So many preperations to finish before Friday comes.
Happy to see beautiful-taken pictures.
Including mine being selected!
Weet~
Happy la.
And i'm totally looking forward in the grand opening of our PixelLab Competition gallery =D
Fellow schoolmates, please do come support us on that day ok?? ^^

Tomorrow brings a better day.
Stay happy-go-lucky everyday and i'll have lesser worries making my life miserable.

Labels: - Pointing a finger at someone = Pointing 4 fingers back at yourself.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Taking without asking is stealing.
Moreover, it's taking people's personal stuff for own usage without the owner's acknowledgement.
It's worse.
Haiz.
Why commit such a stupid act when you know what's gonna come one day??
And to provoke the wrong person.
One word... dumb.
Maybe you don't see the seriousness in the consequences you'll get.
Well, you do, now.
I suppose, just a word, Sorry, wouldn't be able to turn the table around.
Now i can sing this song! Although i don't like it at all =S
"It's too late to apologise~ It's too late~"
Lol.

Fully packed till Saturday!

Quick tell me!
Will you be mine?? =)

Labels: - Changing for a better tomorrow

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Came across an email.
It tells a story, a Philosophy story that really makes sense.
I actually smiled after reading it =)
And so, i'm going to share with all of my peeps what actually made me think and smile, just that very moment. ^^
Enjoy~

Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y Y

A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous 'yes'.

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

'The golf balls are the important things - your God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

'The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, and your car.'

'The sand is everything else--the small stuff.'

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.'

'The same goes for life.'
'If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.'

'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.'
'Play with your children.'
'Take time to get medical checkups.'
'Take your partner out to dinner.'
'Play another 18.'

'There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.'
'Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter.'

'Set your priorities.'
'The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked.'
'It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a cup of coffee with a friend.'

Moral of the story?
-Set your priorities right.

Labels: - Silence is golden

I'm trying to turn things around.

I need a life.

Feel so fucked up now.
About alot of things revolving around me.

A beautiful, adorable baby just made my gloomy night twinkle.

Loving you is hard.
Getting you to love me is harder.

Labels: - Love is a complicated thing.

Sunday, August 03, 2008

Sore limbs & throat.
Tired-looking eyes & blank mind.
But a winning spirit, that's all we're left with =)

Alot of things didn't go as planned.
But i guess... WE STILL DID IT!
Hmmm everyone had their roles, done their part and yeah, way to go ^^

There's always obstacles obstructing the progress along the way.
It's the way how we overcome it and find a solution to it.

Well, i happen to come across something.
I guess there's some misunderstandings somewhere somehow.
But in life, there's a lot of things that people don't happen to see it with their own eyes.
It's always filled with their own thoughts & views.
People, who also includes me, usually sees only the outcome & assume.
But never would they understand the process of the whole situation.
Because, on certain circumstances, we're just outsiders.
And outsiders only see what's shown in front of them, and not knowing what is the cause.
But... they're not totally at fault if their assumptions are wrong.
They just needs the truth to do some amendments to their thinkings.

OK! It's just part of my random thoughts again.

I just quarrelled with my parents again.
Regretted, yet i don't want to apologise.
Haiz.
I think i said alot of hurting words to my mama just now.
And i felt bad about it.
Why oh why do i always lose my temper and vent it to whoever's in front of me =(

I don't want to be like this again.
I need to laugh it off next time.
Control, control.

Labels: - waiting for the right moment

Friday, August 01, 2008

Missed school for a 'dry-run' of our tomorrow's NDP dinner event.
How ____.
I was thinking, actually we can do everything we did there today in school.
We can not miss Design.
Geez.
So hot & humid.
Even with the huge white tent above our heads, it still feels like we're under the scorching, blazing hot sun.
The temperature seems to find it's way in, to torture us.
Shirts soaked with beads of perspiration.

Ok...
I get it.
We're there to have a look at our on-site.
Right, got it -.-"

Argh...
Why am i always complaining?!?!

Just hope everything will work out just fine tomorrow.
God.
I got a strong feeling, she doesn't believe i can do a good job.
Sheesh.
Hello...
I can prove it to you that i can do my part very nicely.
If you did give me something to handle with, that is.
It's just not fair to the insignificant ones in class, which too, involves me.
Every single important roles were given to those significant ones, then what are we left with??
Hey, look at everyone's capability 'beyond your fingers'.
Not just at it.
Because like this, you'll find nothing.
Some quiet ones do have their potentials in something somehow.
It's just if you want to discover them or not.
Well, at least one teacher, hmmm, maybe two, can see what we're capable of doing.
No offense.
It's just a girl's random thoughts.
And voicing them out here on random accounts =)

Anyway, it's a workless Friday for me today.
Hmmm unusual though.
I don't usually slack at home on a weekends.
Didn't expect the whole 'dry-run' thing would end so early.
Never mind.
At least i can catch the final episode of Beach.Ball.Babes =D
And i think there's a late night blockbuster or something.

Ahhhh~
No money~

I miss my friends =(

It's the first day of a new month!
It's August~ It's August~

Labels: - Thank God It's Friday