| Wednesday, September 21, 2005 |
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found out the truth of how ppl think of me... finally... mind full of unhappiness now... actually jus put the phrase 'a smile with a shattered heart for fun' haha~ nv tot it came true so fast... thanks to those who told me everything... thanks for encouragin me & consolin me... really appreciate it... =) for those who prefer tokin behind my back... i really dispised this act... if u dun like me jus speak in front of me... voice out any unhappiness... y care if i would get hurt or watsoever if u dun like me... rite?... hey pals... i think i did nth wrong... it's jus tat... u all hav many comments on anything i do... wat should i do when even i cry, laugh, get angry or even act silly, u also mus comment on them... like this mite as well i jus sit in one corner & face 4 walls havin zi bi zhen... if tat makes u all happy... i dun mind bein really quiet frm now on... noone's perfect... think before u all say anythin... if u really can name out every of ur unhappiness bout me... did u ever think tat u're not as gd as i m... for goodness sakes!! really couldn't take this anymore... all u all can say is changed... but when i ask u all... how hav i changed or wat hav i changed... u all jus kept quiet... if u really think i changed then ans my freakin ques... for god's sake man... haiz~ actually only carol understans me... bu kuei shi wo de hao yo... every of my frens claimed tat i changed... y dun u try to look frm my inside instead of jus judgin a book by it's cover... u c only the cover but not yet read the story till the endin... do u think u can understan the whole story? the whole me?... honestly to tell u pals... i din change! for god's sake i din! as for u dawn... i jus hav no choice but to name u out... i can freakin tell u... u dun understan a single bit of me! all u know bout me is tat i'm one of ur fren who is younger than u by one day! really feel like smackin my head man... dun try to act clever & say rubbish... i'm not an ah lian! i hate tat word ah lian... watch wat u say next time... if u dun like me jus voice it out to me... dun say them to my frens makin them misunderstood me... stupid misunderstandins start cos of all this ppl who dun use their own eyes to look carefully... i jus merely played with yong shu... really for GOD'S SAKE!!! arrrrr!!! & u said i changed alot! act ah lian only! i really m so mad hearin this... if u r so darin y keep askin everyone if they hav noticed if i've changed... jus come forward & ASK ME!!! i can giv u a complete nice ans... ppl! dun think i'm blur & stupid & know almost nth... i know wat's happenin around me... & me CHERLYN LOK IS NOT AS STUPID AS U ALL THINK... comeon~ sometimes i dun need to always voice out my troubles to anyone cos i hav my rites to keep it in my heart... i hav my way to forget them... so dun act clever say cos i nv voice out my problems & this makes u all not close... when i wanna voice out to u all i will... i definitely will... steph & huizhen... jus dun always make ppl around u unhappy by ur remarks & comments... n for ur information... they know if u r tokin behind their back or not... i dun mean to confront u this way... but i jus dun wan ppl to get upset over small things... jus keep some things to urselves next time... it's hurtin to hear things tat ppl dun like... haiz~ think tat's all ba... finally rmb sth... thanks to carol's mum... she said sth tat maybe noone could hav said... 'dun care wat others say bout u... jus do wat u think is rite & dun feel sad if u hav a clear conscience'... this really made me so touched & almost cried... thanks to those who really spared a tot for me & always there for me when i needed them most =) for ppl who thinks i can't do well in xams... i'll prove u all wrong... i'll pass for u all to c... i won let anyone look down on me... i may be blur & act silly... but i know when to be serious & when to work hard ^-^ ( ^_<)\/ luv, lyn =countdown:28 more days= |